5 Signs You’re Angrier Than You Think

Truth be told, Anger in itself is never a problem or some big issue. It is a fundamental feature naturally imprinted into our lives. Even when you argue that you’re so cool and calm, probably on the outside, it doesn’t mean anger isn’t playing a certain role in your life; you probably know how to suppress or contain it to an extent.

Research study proves every single Human being can be super reactive and can get angry. The only difference is how we express the feeling of anger or how we control the output.
If you figure most times you only tend to adapt to the fact that you’re never angry, there’s a greater tendency that you’re angrier than you want to admit, or you’re just too oblivious to how you react to things at times.
Anger is not a socially acceptable emotion. Therefore, a lot of people tend to mask it. And when they get used to doing this, it becomes an enduring habit that they become so good at, and eventually – they don’t even realize they’re capable of being angry anymore.
On the contrary, No matter how good you are at masking your emotions, or, Anger, It will eventually surface someday.
As we said, anger is never a bad thing in itself. However, getting to know and acknowledging the signs to watch out for even when you “feel” you don’t have anger issues or that You’re Angrier Than You Think could be very helpful. If you fail to take major cognizance of it, it could produce negative effects in your life;

Here are 5 Signs You’re Angrier Than You Think and some helpful tips to help you get better;

1. Constant Rumination;

Rumination comes up when one develops the habit of constant, intense, often negative, and unproductive thoughts about past mistakes or errors. Let’s take, for instance, A negative comment from a friend triggered your memory of the same mirrored event from the past, and you spend the remaining hours of the day contemplating all over again the past mistakes attached to that particular thing and all the negative consequences that followed. If care is taken, you will begin to feel uncontrolled anger as a result of this.

While constant rumination could lead to shame, sadness, and seclusion (Sometimes), it is often fueled by anger, particularly from within.
And just because you don’t get angry at people doesn’t signify you’re exempted. Anger from within or Self-Selfed anger can be an issue, too. you might be super nice, friendly, quiet, or tolerant when it comes to dealing with people;
or probably because you don’t snap at others, you seldom look visibly angry, you’re not aggressive, or you don’t lose your cool when things go south sides, but it is generally known that “looks can be deceiving.”

Most of the angriest people carry a particular cool-headed, sweet, and adorable best look! Even the closest people around, however, can be capable of manifesting extreme types of anger due to the constant rumination they have And the negative self-selected anger within them.
Here’s a quick tip on how to deal with constant rumination and the anger that comes with it;

Always remember that you can often get rid of people. If anyone is around you who constantly gives you a huge headache by constantly reminding you of your past mistakes, please be sure to leave the door open for such to walk out. If you can’t stay away from such, leave their presence whenever they bring up issues that could trigger you.
You can visit a therapist often and relate how you feel and what exactly is going on in your mind to them; that’s why they’re good at their job; they will put you through and help you overcome that feeling.
Let go; Free your mind from all forms of guilt, and always remember we’re humans, and we all make mistakes. Yours is certainly not the first, nor will it ever be the last, dear!

Read Also: Top therapeutic effects of music on stress and anxiety

2. Chronic Anxiety

Unbelievable, but the truth is people who often get super anxious are usually so afraid to even come to terms with their anger issues, so to avoid the stress they’ll go through in realizing this, they suppress it.
As deceptive as it seems, vastly anxious people usually look the opposite of being angry. They could even act as a whip, a pushover, or meek. However, the very fact that they often do not appear to be angry doesn’t signify they are not. But the real fact to face here is that anger is natural, and it is one of the human emotions.
Some people even fear upsetting others or perhaps being angry themselves, and as a result of this, they take on so much anxiety and stress just so they can avoid anger.
For instance, a girl who grew up in a very abusive environment where she couldn’t express herself would, as she gets older, she would eventually learn that expressing herself would lead to being hurt.
Soon she’d begin to ignore her anger (which would eventually give more space to more unraveled anger). As she suppressed it, it became deeper with time, and lastly, the result could be explosive. She might not even be able to stand up for herself or get to defend herself anymore.
Here’s a quick tip on how to deal with Chronic Anxiety and the anger that comes with it;
Always remember that;
The earth is a very huge place, you meet people every day, and you can not always be limited by who you currently are. Vent it all out, and give a reaction, if possible, immediately. You might not need to snap or be violent but relate immediately to the person who triggered you quickly and with smartness, treat it or sort it out, and move on.
Give yourself some time. Take your time to process things, and always remember your past isn’t your present. If you have to be quiet for a while, go on, but make sure to stand up for yourself eventually.

3. Passive-Aggressive Communication

Some People become passive-aggressive when they experience intense anger; to get what they want, they often try to act aggressively but are often fearful to acknowledge it. They don’t take responsibility for their actions, and they equally always try to hide it.

For instance;
Having a chronic migraine before you were supposed to attend a party arranged by your boss for that one person you disliked so much at the office. Or you came in late for the meetings or appointments with so many excuses prepared on your mind because it is beyond you, but you hate to see the chairman.
Intentionally doing poor work or loafing around so that that “horrible” being ends up doing it.
Unfortunately, It breeds an irresponsible, unreliable, flaky, and very immature personality before important people in your life and relationships. You could even be isolated due to these characters perceived by people around you. Soon enough, you might slowly become this, too, and it could result in shame, low self-esteem, and self-loathing.
Here’s a quick tip on how to deal with Passive Aggressive Communication and the anger that comes with it;
Always remember that;

You need to be more assertive.

Acknowledge your anger and frustration and act right.
Be very honest with yourself and others around you.
Treat everyone around you with due respect.

4. Hypercriticism

People often use hypercriticism to mask the reality of expressing their anger by acting cool through intellectual criticism of others to cover their anger (self-selected anger) from within and insecurities.
If, at every instant, you wanted to criticize others or judge them, it may be because you haven’t acknowledged your anger issues or gotten to know more about your inner emotions.

It should be noted that sometimes, not all criticism comes from anger. But judgemental would never look angry, either. It takes you to realize concretely from which angle you’re criticizing.
The truth is, the more you criticize others, the more the reflection of your true self is glaring. Probably you’re criticizing them cause you don’t feel good about yourself, you’re afraid to make some changes they were able to make, or they took a massive step you decided not to give a shot even though you knew you should.
It can be painful when we realize our inadequacies and shortcomings. However, you do not need to communicate that you’re more knowledgeable than them implicitly, so you feel a bit better – it doesn’t last long. It could only last you temporarily; it would always birth more anger from within and an unsatisfied appetite for more criticism.

Here’s a quick tip on how to deal with Hypercriticismand the anger that comes with it;
Always remember;
You can deal with your insecurities when you are prepared to do so, so do so!
Stop being judgemental and learn to give others another shot at things.
See a therapist.

5. Venting

I mean, who doesn’t vent? We all do. But when it becomes irritating, constant complaining, whining, bitching, or whatever, then you’re getting angrier than you should. If you do it often, it’s a clear indicator that you are more angry than you probably thought.
One of the most effective and healthiest ways to deal with anger issues is acknowledging and validating it. You could let it be or assertively act on it sharply.
We often prefer venting because it gives immediate relief and creates an illusion of releasing it all out. However, it doesn’t solve the actual problem. You might feel alright at that moment. What’s certain, of course, is that it would only prolong your anger in the end.
It’s alright to talk to people about how you feel, but it could lead to frustration when you outrightly vent and complain every time. It’s perfectly fine to feel angry at times, but your reaction to how you feel matters.
If you find yourself in this category, here are some tips to help you;
Try absorbing more, let it go, and overlook it.
Rather than speaking out every time, why don’t you take action instead?
Take a walk; whenever you feel drained, stroll. Give yourself over to the wonders of nature.
Avoid triggers at all costs.

In conclusion;

It is very normal to be angry; it is part of human emotions, so it’s not wrong. And just like other emotions, anger is not to be ashamed of, get to know more about you. Do not be in denial about your anger; doing this could lead to a lot of trouble.